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Chinese Man Divorces Wife Over Son’s Surname, Loses Custody Battle

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A Chinese man divorced his wife following a disagreement over whose surname their son should take. The couple, Shao and Ji, had a daughter in 2019, and she took Mr Shao’s surname. But when their son was born in 2021, Ms Ji insisted he bear her surname. 

Despite Mr Shao’s repeated demands for a name change, his wife refused, leading to their separation and eventual divorce, according to the South China Morning Post.

After they split, both children remained with Ms Ji. Mr Shao sought custody of his daughter but was willing to give up custody of his son. Ms Ji, however, insisted on keeping both children. The case went to court, where Ms Ji was granted full custody, as she had been the primary caregiver.

Chinese courts decide child custody based on the “best interests of the child,” often favouring mothers, though parents’ caregiving abilities are also considered.

Mr Shao appealed the ruling, but a higher court upheld the decision. He was ordered to pay child support until both children turned 18.

In a similar dispute, a married couple in China is on the brink of divorce after arguments over their son’s surname. The wife, Xiangjia, said both families agreed before marriage that their firstborn, regardless of gender, would take the mother’s surname.

But after their son’s birth, her husband repeatedly demanded a change, arguing that children traditionally inherit their father’s name, SCMP reported.

Tensions escalated when Ms Xiangjia underwent surgery and returned home to find that her mother-in-law had unilaterally changed the child’s name. Her husband also began calling their son by the new name. Frustrated, Ms Xiangjia suggested divorce, but her husband refused, claiming ownership of their house, car, and son.

Since 1980, China’s Marriage Law has allowed children to inherit either parent’s surname. Though traditionally rare, maternal surnames are becoming more common. A 2021 study found that only 1.4 per cent of those born between 1986 and 2005 took their mother’s surname. But the trend is rising. Shanghai saw 8.8 per cent of newborns with maternal surnames in 2018, and nationwide, the figure reached 7.7 per cent in 2020, per the Ministry of Public Security.




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